It’s always a beautiful day when we women stand up and speak up for ourselves and others. So you can imagine my excitement when I woke up two days ago and my twitter feed was filled with a lot of women making the decision to let their voices be heard, by calling out their abusers and sharing their stories with our community.
In true social media fashion, when women decide to “fight the power”, there will always be individuals, men and women alike, that choose to either blame the victim, silence the victim, defend the perpetrator or make false accusations.
Before I even begin to tackle each of these individuals. Can we take a moment and deep the reality that almost every woman in our respective societies, has been a victim of some form of sexual assault ?
If it’s not a disgusting parent, a revolting relative, an obnoxious family employee, a heinous co-worker or a detestable partner, it is the random boy that lives next door or the acquaintance that you met at a friend’s house or how about when you’re walking down the road and a random guy upskirts you. What I’m trying to say is that the society is filled with all forms of sexual harassment at literally every angle that you turn your head.
This is why I get very confused when people say “What was she wearing ?”, “What were you doing in a man’s house in the first place ?” or “Why would you be going for house parties ?”
It seems to me that society believes that as long as a woman keeps herself as far away from men as she possibly can, then she would not get harassed ?
So basically, women are supposed to naturally believe that every man is a sexual predator? Got it.
You’re asking us why we are still shouting on this issue ?
You’re telling us that this sexual abuse talk is yesterday’s news ?
Excuse you, there is no statute of limitations on sexual abuse.
Should I get into the mental, physical and emotional distortion that accompanies this form of assault ?
The way a female begins to blame herself for the abuse and begins to believe that something particular about her caused her to be a victim?
The way a woman begins to withdraw from society because she feels like she is damaged goods and no longer has a place in society?
How about the ladies that have been driven to suicide ?
Or the ladies that decided to speak out and were constantly let down till they started to believe that maybe it was a product of their delusions and it never actually happened ?
The root of the problem has never been with the victim but with the perpetrator. Why are we not teaching our boys self-control or respect for women ?
We raise boys to be entitled. Not just to the largest portion of food or to the window seat on the flight or to the higher amount of pay for the same job but we are raising them to believe they are entitled to a woman’s body.
A lot of women are being sexually assaulted by their partners in relationships and by their husbands in marriage because these men believe they own them and can do as they please regardless of what the woman feels.
Now women are having to take self-defence classes or walk around with pepper spray.
Little girls are afraid to speak up when a school teacher touches them and violates them.
10 year old girls are forced into marriages in various parts of the world.
Our world has become completely and utterly disgusting.
We have to do better.
Watching huge amounts of women take a stand against this revolting act is an incredible step towards a lot of change.
And for those who make false accusations against men. You should be completely and utterly ashamed of yourselves. In your attempt to destroy a man’s reputation, you spit in the faces of women who have had to deal with this form of assault and are trying to find some form of peace and justice.
This post isn’t ending in a proper fashion because I don’t believe we are done talking about this.